Compass Rose Academy, Cloud and Townsend
Compass Rose Academy is all about helping families raise great kids. In additions to providing treatment for at-risk teenage girls, CRA Staff cares about seeing families succeed. Troubled teenage girls receive help at CRA; and families find healing.
When it comes to parenting and helping families become successful CRA suggests reading “Raising Great Kids” by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. In the book Townsend and Cloud reference a parenting paradigm that should not be overlooked.
1. Remember it’s about the future, not today. It’s about equipping your child to not just cope but manage to live successfully through adulthood. Remember parenting is an investment in your child’s future.
2. The goal is to develop character. Character is defines as the set of capacities necessary to meet the demands of reality. Think about what your child’s realities are and how equipped they are to handle them…then ask yourself who is handling their reality; the parent or the child? Your child cannot learn how to handle adult reality if at first they do not learn how to handle their own. Yes, of course, that does mean failure. But failure is a teachable moment; and that builds character.
3. Connectedness. Experiencing relationships is the stuff life is made of; it begins with the parent-child relationship and progresses to teacher-child; friend-child, and so on. Townsend says that research supports the idea that healthy relationships directly correlate to success in life. Vulnerability, trust and empathy are three key skills Townsend says are essential to building healthy relationships.
4. Responsibility. Own your life…as a parent and as a child; these are not the same and it is up to the parents to help children own their life; their reality, not do it for them.
5. Reality. Perfection is not reality; failure happens. Life is not always positive, and positive results are not always part of the equation and kids need to learn how to handle failure, disappointment and mistakes. Parents can help their children learn how to admit fault; accept their failures and shortcomings; and, know that there are still loved. Forgiveness is a large part of reality: learn it, use it, do it.
6. Competence. In life we are judged on our work and how we perform in any given situation so it is important that children know how they are gifted and how to recognize their passion so they can develop a good work ethic. The good work ethic directs them onto the path of achievement that will support them in their careers.
7. Morality. It is a parent’s responsibility to make time with their children and establish a moral code of ethics. Boom. No excuses.
8. Spiritual Life. Spirituality is the moral compass and since children are naturally curious about God, parents should make time to talk about their own faith with their children; share their spiritual experiences and help their children with their own spiritual journey.
Townsend and Cloud make it clear when they says: children are parent’s top priority and we are the only parents our children will ever have. Put in the time no matter how old your children are.